'Out of your vulnerabilities will come your strength' - Freud
Its ok to not feel ok, but if you’re in the need of support to understand the emotional difficulties you’re facing, perhaps you can consider talking about it. Together, we will get you back to your happy self.
ARE YOU OK?
Are you finding it difficult to think about the positives in yourself? You might also feel you aren't deserving of the good things in life? Perhaps in your job you find it difficult to assert yourself, often coming away from situations where you feel you might have been taken advantage of? Are you settling for less than what you can achieve?
STRESS AND ANXIETY
You might be feeling overwhelmed and pressured to make all the right decisions. It can be difficult losing control of different aspects of your life. This might leave you with sleepless nights and a mind that is constantly going over affecting your ability to relax. Do you feel anxious about your future, stressed about pressures that are put on you? Do you feel that waking up in the morning brings so much uncertainty, worry and unhappiness?
Are you feeling misunderstood or unheard by a close relative, friend or partner? Do you feel rejected and abandoned by those closest to you? We all know relationships can be difficult, but are they becoming a big stress in your life and making you increasingly unhappy? More often these are a repetition and being aware of these patterns can break the cycle.
LOW OR DEPRESSED?
When seeing others around you happy and fulfilled, it can sometimes make you wonder what am I doing wrong? Why can't I just wake up feeling good? Why does the simplest of tasks feel so hard? It's like a cloud of doom following you everywhere you go. Therapy is proven to be as affective as medication but better as the affects of the therapy last well after treatment has ended.
Everyone gets angry at times, but is it disproportionate to the issue at hand? Do you fly off the handle quickly and not understanding why? Knowing ourselves also means knowing what makes us tick. Being out of control of these emotions can leave you feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. These can send us into a state of panic, or 'panic attack'. By giving voice to these feelings, you no longer become overwhelmed by them.
HOPELESS & HELPLESS
It's ok to not feel ok, it becomes a problem when we don't have anyone to speak to when we have those moments. To seek help when we are helpless shows strength. To seek hope when we feel hopeless shows courage. We are surrounded everyday by pressures big and small i.e work, family, finances, health, questioning whether the decisions we make are right or wrong. To sit with all these worries over time build up to leave you feeling there is no way out, it is all too much.
I am an experienced and fully accredited psychodynamic psychotherapist. My experience tells me through self-reflection and a solid understanding of our thoughts, feelings and intentions, we can all improve our quality of wellbeing. Through decades of working 1-2-1 with people, I understand that therapy provides a safe and supportive space that can help you grow as a person.
My passion is to help people improve their psychological wellbeing and aid them on a journey of personal growth. I believe the aim of therapy is to feel less 'half-alive'. I feel it is crucial to gain a greater self-awareness of our daily thoughts and behaviours and break the frustrating repetition that we find ourselves in time and time again.
My aim is to provide a safe and comfortable space for you to talk. I can empathise with it not being the easiest thing to admit, needing help with emotional distress but being in analysis for many years myself, I have seen the benefits of having regular open-ended therapy. I am proud and passionate to now be in the position of helping others.
I feel it’s important for my clients to be understood, so I do my best to ask only the right questions without being intrusive, allowing enough space to talk without interruption. I also want to get to know you as a person so that I can really get to see what it might be like in your shoes. Empathy is incredibly important for us all to have, even more so if you’re a therapist. I pride myself on being an empathetic person who will do my best to listen and try to understand the issues that surround your life.
Life certainly has it highs and lows which can be overwhelming at times and being overwhelmed can sometimes take over all the other aspects of our lives. I'm here, ready to work with you on understanding those moments that make you feel unhappy, fearful and alone and make sense of the ups and downs we all experience. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
As far as my approach and qualifications, I am a psychodynamically trained, qualifying with a post graduate diploma in psychodynamic theory and practice at one of London's leading clinical and academic institutions, WPF Therapy. WPF highly respected and known for its long and rigorous training to ensure I provide my clients with the highest standard of psychotherapy.
With this, I am registered and bound by the ethics of the British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), The foundation of Counsellors and Psychotherapists (FPC), The International Association For Forensic Psychotherapy (IAFP) and the UK council for Psychotherapy (UKCP).
I also hold an voluntary position at an NHS Counselling and Psychotherapy service at a category B prison.
I am registered with the following health insurance providers:
I am bound by the ethics of the following professional governing bodies:
WHAT IS PSYCHOTHERAPY?
Psychotherapy gives you the space to talk in a safe place without the judgement, opinions or advice. It’s often frustrating to not feel heard, understood or results in others giving you their opinions, which often only frustrates you further. In this day and age of rising levels of bad mental health, social media and industry, it can be difficult to feel as content and happy with oneself.
We have little time to reflect to our own mental states, with mobile phones eradicating boredom, it distracts us from what is really important, how we feel. Our ability to think about and gain insight to our interpersonal relationships gets lost leaving us unsure of our behaviours and patterns that are continuously being acted out time and time again.
Even 50 minutes a week being able to think about our lives and discuss it in a space where we can both think about what might be going on can have profound effects on our overall well being. It's normal not to share everything that is going on in your head, but sometimes you just want to get it off your chest. The thought of doing so to those closest to you can leave you feeling as though you're burdening them with your problems, which doesn't sit comfortably. However, speaking to a therapist, someone removed from every aspect from your life, someone who is trained to listen and where you know it will stay in the room, can give you a real sense of relief.
Therapy can help you become more self aware by giving you that time to reflect and talk. It is a collaborative experience for both therapist and client to gain a better understanding of your internal world and how to make more sense of it. Together we can help you gain a better perspective on some of the positive and negative patterns that repeat themselves over and over. If you are in an unhappy place and you find yourself repeating these patterns then you will need therapy. This will help you stop the repetition leading to a more fulfilled life.
Therapy can be tough, it’s not easy to sit with negative emotions that we find hard to accept. As a species, approximately 90% of our communication is non verbal. This means most of our unconscious behaviours get lost in communication, which might result in us repeating patterns and finding ourselves in the same destructive relationships or unhappy jobs. The therapist's job is to listen to the non verbal and what might be lost and help you bring it to consciousness, this is where self awareness begins.
I often hear people telling me that showing feelings is weak. If this is the case then why is it so difficult to do so. It takes great strength and courage to look within ourselves and feel some of those repressed feelings. Therapy is a process of carefully looking at those feelings without causing huge psychological distress in a safe environment. It has been proven that is is as effective as medication only better as the effects of the therapy are ongoing even when it has ended.
I feel in todays society, not feeling ok - is not ok, in my therapy room - it is.
London Bridge Practice
Borough House Rooms
Borough House Rooms
78-80 Borough High St
Borough House Rooms is located on 78-80 Borough High street next to Black Katz Lettings. To gain access please push the door on the main high street, then you will see an intercom on the wall, please press for Borough House Rooms. Once you are buzzed through please use the stairs/lift to access either 3rd or 4th floor where you will see a waiting area (Borough House Rooms occupies 2 floors, I would have let you know which one on the confirmation email). I will collect you at the time of your appointment.
For both locations, I kindly ask that you do not arrive more than five minutes before your appointment time. As I do not have a receptionist, I have to leave my therapy room to let people into the building, which may not be possible if I am in another session immediately before you arrive.
145 New London Road
Rochester House is located on New London Road on the corner of Anchor Street opposite The New London restaurant. When you arrive you will need to press the doorbell located on the plaque labelled
'Dean Cashman Counselling & Psychotherapy' (this is a separate doorbell located to the side of the intercom panel) and I will let you in. Take the stairs to the first floor where I will meet you.
Parking is restricted in the surrounding area. There are two car parks nearby: Parkway carpark (CM20DG – exit by stairs to rear of carpark) and Moulsham Street Carpark (CM20LD). There is also parking available for 1 hour at Moulsham Street. There is also George St carpark 2 minutes walk away but tends to get busy until around 3pm.
I kindly ask you buzz the intercom at the time of your appointment as I do not have a receptionist, buzzing any earlier will interrupt an earlier session.
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Office: 01245 698440
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I also do online therapy sessions
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